How to Greet Someone Observing the Jewish Day of Atonement

Okay so I got asked this question like three times last week and I realized maybe I should just write something about it because clearly people genuinely dont know. And thats fine! Nobody expects you to know everything about every religious observance. But heres the thing – if someone you care about is observing Yom Kippur, you probably want to say the right thing.

First off, dont say “Happy Yom Kippur.” Just… dont. I know it feels natural because we say happy everything else, but Yom Kippur is literally the Day of Atonement. Its a solemn day of fasting and reflection – real self-care in its most traditional form. Nobody’s throwing confetti.

The traditional greeting is “G’mar chatima tova” which basically means “may you be sealed in the Book of Life for good.” Thats… kind of heavy actually? The whole concept is that God is writing down who gets what fate for the coming year. But if that feels like too much, you can also say “have an easy fast” or “have a meaningful Yom Kippur.” Both are totally appropriate.

My friend Sarah (whos Jewish, obviously, I dont just make up sources) told me that “have an easy fast” is probably the safest bet if youre not Jewish yourself. Its acknowledging what theyre doing without overstepping into religious territory you might not fully understand. Which… yeah, that tracks.

The fast goes from sundown to sundown – roughly 25 hours – and during that time observant Jews dont eat, drink, bathe, wear leather shoes, or… other things. Its serious business. So when you see your coworker looking a little rough around 3pm on Yom Kippur, maybe dont ask them to go grab lunch with you?

If you want to learn more about the significance of this day in the Jewish calendar, Britannica has a solid overview. Its actually pretty fascinating once you get into it.

One more thing – some people might not want to talk about it at all, and thats okay too. Just be respectful. Read the room. The usual stuff.